Tourniquet
by BeeCityz
Summary: Creepy, or dedicated? When you're in love, does it even matter? AkuRoku, slightly morbid. Dedicated to Xanjen 'cuz she's awesome.
1. Chapter 1

Axel sighed and dropped his head in his hands, painfully unwilling to get out of his stretch limo and walk the three hundred feet to his house. The sidewalk was swarming with fans, and even his semi-elite team of body guards couldn't keep all of them back. They gently rocked the car, and with his eyes closed it was easy to imagine that he was on a cruise ship, the waves moving it gently from side to side.

"Are you okay?" Renee's familiar voice echoed somewhere far away, and he was forced to look up and smile at her reassuringly.

"Yeah. I'm fine. It's just…" He waved around, indicating the chaos outside of his current location, and frowned. "…this mess drives me insane. I'm half tempted to give up the fame and fortune so that I can walk into my own home without someone tackling me and forcing an autograph."

She smiled back at him and tilted her head, her long brown hair falling over her left shoulder. "I know what you mean. But hey, at least it doesn't last very long. You just have to slide out and run up to the house, and then it'll just be you and me and Mr. Fuzzy-Face."

"Yeah." Axel muttered, perking up slightly. "Mr. Fuzzy-Face. My poor kitty…he probably feels so disenfranchised."

"Okay." She chuckled and took his hand, pulling him towards the door of the car; the absolute last place he wanted to be. "So can we go in so that he feels loved and adored like we both know he is?"

Axel groaned, but reached across and threw the door open anyway. Immediately, all of the cheering that had been muted by the thick doors and bullet-resistant glass assaulted them, the two hundred plus people pressing in on them in every direction but forward. Despite their general ineptness, the body guards had managed to clear a path for the two of them to escape to their home.

"One, two, three…" Renee murmured, and just as the last syllable fell from her lips Axel grabbed her wrist. Together, they shot forward toward the large gate that marked the entrance to the estate which was already opening for them. More security came marching through, pushing back the groups of people who wanted to gain entrance to their idol's sanctuary.

And then they were there. The gates were closing behind them, they were both panting from the sprint, and they were safe from the fans. They were all still outside, cheering and yelling, and hesitantly Axel turned around and offered a small wave. The crowd erupted, and he sighed.

Renee rubbed his shoulder and smiled, leading him towards the house. "See? That wasn't too difficult, was it? And now we're here, and you can get some sleep, and I'll make something to eat…"

"And I'm going to cuddle with Mr. Fuzzy-Face, for the love of God!" Axel added, pouting at her. In response she chuckled, shook her head, and took his hand.

"Yeah, you can cuddle with Mr. Fuzzy-Face. God, if only you loved me as much as you love that damn cat…"

"Psht, please." He replied, rolling his eyes. "I don't love _anyone_ as much as I love Mr. Fuzzy-Face." He smiled up at her, and she slapped him upside the head.

"You're such an idiot."

"Yeah, but you love me."

"Mr. Russo?"

Axel glanced up and pulled his glasses off his face, one of the multiple people the worked for him standing just barely in his company. "Yes?"

"It's fanmail time."

"Oh dear. Is it that time of week already?" He sighed and looked over at the calendar that was sitting on the table in front of him along with his touring schedules and recent credit-card charges and all of the other things that he had to look over but didn't really understand, nor care about.

"Ah…yes sir. Um, we picked out some of the most interesting ones, and they amount to about 500..."

"Oh." Axel perked up immediately and raised his eyebrows, smiling. "Is that it?"

"Ah, yes. Yes sir." This little man smiled and raised his box of letters, setting them down on top of the table and handing a pile to Axel. "Shall we get started?"

"We shall…" Axel sighed again and grabbed the pile, combing a hand through his unruly red hair and opening the first one. "_'Dear Axel, you are the love of my life. I know you probably hear that all the time, but it's true. I left my husband for you. I know that there's something special between us. Please, please understand. I love you. Love, your true love._'"

The two looked at each other, eyebrows raised. "Creepy or dedicated?" Axel asked, and they were silent for a moment, considering the question.

At the same time they both decided, "Creepy."

**Two hours later**

"What number is this?" Axel groaned, reading the first sentence of the letter for the fourth time and still not understanding what it said.

"Um…417." The other man, whose name turned out to be Ted, answered. "What's yours say?"

"Uh…'_Dear Axel, you're beautiful. I know you have a girlfriend, and I promise I'm not trying to come in between you. What she doesn't know can't hurt her._' And then there's a wink at the end. What about yours?"

"I'm just getting a new one now." Ted sighed and looked at the envelope, then did a double take. "Ah…sir?"

"Yeah, Ted? And really, you should call me Axel. That is my name, after all." He chuckled and glanced over expectantly. "What is it?"

"I think you should take a look at this." He handed Axel the envelope, who looked at it, then, too, did a double take.

"Is this written in…?"

"Blood, yeah, that's what I thought." Ted cleared his throat, and Axel scratched at the writing on the front that had his name and address on it. Sure enough, the dark red substance flaked off, and underneath was the unmistakable stain of blood on the paper.

"Whoa. Freaky." He muttered. He turned it over in his hands a few times, examining it, not really sure what he was looking for (it wasn't like the person who wrote it could've fit a bomb inside or anything.) "Should I open it?"

"Hell yes you should open it." Ted replied, staring intently at the small parcel in the redhead's hands.

Axel chuckled and nodded, but the moment he turned it over and broke the seal, all humor from the moment was gone. He pushed his finger across the top slowly, the paper splitting easily to allow him entrance to the curious letter inside.

He hesitated a moment before pulling the unoffending piece of paper out of its shell, but when he did, he was almost surprised to see that it was just a normal piece of paper. It was folded in thirds, and it was written on a papyrus-like sheet through which the writing was minutely visible.

"I feel like I'm about to unveil some sort of seriously secret stuff." Axel whispered dramatically, pulling the folds apart to look at the words beneath.

It was by far the shortest message that he had gotten all day, and it, too, was written in blood. It had run slightly, and the way it turned out reminded Axel of the chiller font on his computer. It was dark red, flaky, and the message that followed didn't do anything to lessen the creepiness of it all.

"What does it say?" Ted whispered, leaning down and trying to decipher the scribbly handwriting.

Axel sighed and cleared his throat, putting his glasses back on his face. "It say…'_I bet _she _hasn't spilled blood for you._'"

"Whoa." Ted muttered.

"Yeah, that's seriously creepy."

"Is that person talking about--"

"Renee, yeah."

There was silence between them, and it was a silence that said everything that neither of them could find the words for. It said that this letter was far more strange than anything that he had ever gotten, ever. It said that this was more serious than all of the other letters talking about Renee, because it didn't compare her to the author, it didn't put her down or point out her flaws, or even threatened her life. It just stated a fact that was, in fact, true: Renee had never spilled one drop of blood for Axel, and this person had written a letter and addressed an envelope in theirs.

"Should I call someone?" Ted whispered, pulling away from the letter. He walked stiffly back to his chair on the other side of the table and sat down, his knees slightly shaking. "Like the police?"

"Ah…um…" Axel's brow furrowed and he shook his head slowly, looking down at his lap. "No, no. It's okay. Just…just an overzealous fan, I think."

"Okay, well--"

"Hey, what're you guys up to?" Renee came walking into the room her white tank top and shorts to match hanging loosely from her thin body. "What's that?"

Axel glanced over his shoulder at her quickly and immediately folded up the piece of paper, stuffed it into his pocket for no real reason. He knew, and he wasn't quite sure why, but he knew that he didn't want his soon-to-be fiancée seeing this letter, under any circumstances.

"It's nothing." He said hurriedly after the paper was hidden from sight. "Nothing at all. Just some fanmail."

"Oh." She walked over and placed her hand on his shoulder, looking down at the table. "You know you've been at this for the last like, six hours, right?"

"Oh dear." Axel glanced at his watch, which now read 11:00 p.m., and stood up. "That's far too long, isn't it?"

Renee just chuckled and pecked him on the cheek, and the redhead quickly glanced at Ted, who gave him an understanding look. "Ted, could you take care of this for me, please?"

"Of course." Ted answered, piling all of the papers into one and dropping them into the bin once more. "You two…have a good night's rest."

Axel chuckled and turned around, his arm around Renee's waist, eyebrows raised. "Yeah, Ted. Right."

* * *

**A/N:** Okay, guys. I know you're probably a little surprised because this story didn't appear in the voting polls. Sorry about that (if any of you are really that upset) but the fic that definitely will be coming next, without a doubt, is "Who's Your Daddy?" xD

Unfortunately, it still needed some plot developments and what not so I decided to push it back a little and put this one first. Sorries. D8

So! This one is a little morbid, and there's probably going to be AkuRoku, but only in the very end. xD I know, Axel's hetero! It's scary! Like...really. xDDD He's so not straight, it kinda makes me giggle. But anyway, this is going to be short (I'm predicting about four chapters, including the epilogue) so you guys will only have to suffer for a brief amount of time until the creepy fluff comes along. xD

Review, and enjoy!

~Sara


	2. Chapter 2

Axel walked through the double glass doors of the _Angel Breath Café_ with a bag of gel pens in hand, a copy of each of his four albums that the band has put out, two full-sized posters of himself, and finally a copy of his autobiography tucked safely under his arm. Renee walked beside him, each of them trying to ignore the swarms of fans that were dying to get into the restaurant/café.

There was a table in there already set up for him, with two chairs and plenty of space for his body guards to surround him. Renee was supposed to sit in the back for the first hour and a half of signing, and come to the front for the last hour and a half. They had practiced twice (not that they hadn't been through this before) and now it was the final drill.

"Ah, Mr. Russo," the owner purred, walking up to the redhead, his French accent making something that had been sleeping tick inside Axel. "So glad you could make it. Right dis way."

Axel followed the short man (the word "boy" was probably more appropriate, considering this person looked to be only about twenty-two or twenty-four), who was oddly thin and had shoulder-length chestnut brown hair that would've been beautiful if it belonged to a woman, to his seat, a steaming hot macchiato sitting there waiting for him.

" 'Ere you go." He said, indicating the padded stool and smiling warmly. "Is zere anysink else I can get for you?"

"No, thank you." Axel said, smiling back. He looked over at his shoulder to Renee, who was watching him expectantly, and turned to speak to the owner, only to find that he had disappeared somewhere. "What the…? Where the hell did he go?"

"Um…over there." Renee answered, pointing to someplace behind the counter. Axel turned to look, only to find his girlfriend's escort in the embrace of another man, each pair of hands roaming shamelessly.

"Oh." He blinked and stared for a few moments, and when they didn't part (and it didn't look like they would any time soon) he turned around and nodded at one of the bodyguards, who raised his eyebrows expectantly.

"Could you take her out back?"

The bodyguard nodded and took Renee by the arm, he and two others leading her to the badly hidden door in the back of the room. Axel followed them with his eyes until the door was open and she was safely inside, and sat down with a much exaggerated sigh.

The fans wouldn't be allowed into the café for another half an hour or so, but that didn't prevent the redhead from being able to clearly see their excited faces as they shone through the tinted windows across from him. They waved, grinned, said things to him through the glass that he couldn't hear, as well as other typical fan gestures. It was almost painful for Axel to admit that he was used to this.

"Axel, please, I don't think you understand, I am your _biggest fan_." The woman standing in front of Axel said again, handing him her book and CD case to be signed. "I really, really want you to understand that."

"I do understand…Min…erva?" He asked, raising his eyebrows at the name that was on the ID that she wanted him to sign. "Yeah. Um…I do understand. I appreciate it, so very much."

"Thank you. Thank you, thank you, and thank you." She smiled and took her things back, walked to the door of the café, and turned to wave at him just before she left. He smiled and waved back, then beckoned the next person forward.

To his right, Renee sat patiently and endured each of the overly enthusiastic female fans that came to see their star (the male fans, generally speaking, were a little tamer.) She had her legs crossed, a steaming latte sitting in front of her, eyes trained on something that Axel couldn't see.

"Hi, Mr. Russo." Okay, he had to admit, this girl was pretty. She had straight, long red hair that flowed to the center of her back, deep violet eyes, and the palest skin Axel had ever seen. "I'm so happy to finally be meeting you."

"It's nice to meet you, too Miss…?"

"Ah, you can call me Kat." She said, grinning. "I mean, my name is Katrina, but everyone calls me Kat since that terrible hurricane in Louisiana in like, '05…" She stopped and giggled. "Yeah, okay, I'm rambling."

"It's fine." Axel answered, returning one of her multiple smiles. "I can tell you for sure that you're probably the calmest of some of the fans that I've seen today. Do you have something for me to sign?"

"Oh, yeah." She said. She reached into her purse and pulled out a huge, life-sized poster of the redhead, handing it to him. As he signed it, she turned and smirked at Renee, who raised her eyebrows in response.

"Here you are." Axel leaned back and smiled, capping his pen and sitting it next to him on the table. "Thanks for coming."

Kat redirected her attention to Axel, grinned again, and took the poster. "Thank you so much! This really means a lot to me."

As she turned and walked away, Renee looked at Axel and sighed. "She smirked at me. Did you see her?"

"I didn't, but I don't doubt it in the least." He looked at her and raised his eyebrows. "I'm surprised you're not used to it by now, considering how many tours you've taken with me. I would accuse you of being controlling, but I think I love you too much."

She chuckled. "You're so sweet. It's just that—"

"Um…Mr. Russo?"

Axel turned around at the sound of the timid voice behind him, and Renee stopped talking to see who the next person would be to steal her significant other's attention.

In front of him stood a short, blonde boy with the biggest blue eyes one could picture. Axel found himself subconsciously lost in them, imagining the nonexistent tides that would flow through them daily.

"Yes?" When he finally remembered to speak, his voice sounded distant and unlike his own.

"Did you get my letter?"

For a moment, the redhead was considering answering with 'Do you have any idea how many letters I get a day?' but, then Axel noticed the scabs on the boy's fingers and the scars on his wrists that had long since healed. He might not have been the brightest light in the world, but at least he could put two and two together.

"Um…yes, I did. It was…very…very nice of you." He smiled wearily and nodded, and the kid in front of him shifted nervously.

"I wasn't sure if you would like it, but um…" He giggled and stuck out his hand, smiling. "I'm Roxas, by the way. Roxas DuPont."

"Oh my _God_." Axel groaned, dropping down his things on the floor of his kitchen and grabbing an Amp ® out of the fridge. "I swear, if I never sign another autograph it'll be too soon. Do you know how many people showed up in three hours? Over one thousand! I mean, not all of them got in, but isn't that insane?"

"Uh-huh." He looked up to see Renee standing in front of the fridge, along with his band manager and personal agent, and furrowed his brow.

"What're you all watching that's so interesting?"

"Oh, um." Renee turned around, and right off the bat Axel noticed that her eyes were red rimmed and watery. "It's nothing. I think I'm just going to head up to bed, actually."

"Hey," He came forward and walked up to her, stopping about three feet away. "What's the matter? What's going on that I clearly don't know about?"

"Axel," His personal agent came forward, Perry, said as he turned around. "Did you let a man named Theodore into the house about a week or so ago?"

"Ah, Ted? Yeah. He was helping me sort out some of my fan mail. Why?" The redhead looked between his girlfriend, his young (and actually quite attractive) agent, and his old (and painfully grumpy) band manager, confused.

Perry sighed. "Well, he was a mole. Look at this."

Axel stepped forward up to his TV and turned to glance at Renee for some sort of confirmation on what he was being told, but she had already disappeared into their bedroom one story up. Sighing, he turned his attention to the screen.

Displayed on it was a picture of him, shaking the hand of Roxas, the creepy kid who sent him the Blood Letter. Roxas had only been the hundredth (or two hundredth) person he'd talked to earlier, but for the life of him he couldn't get the blonde to leave him alone.

Beneath the picture was a large banner reading, 'Axel Russo, Cheater of the Century!' and a caption along the bottom that ran across every two minutes or so that read, 'When signing autographs today, the secret lover of rock star Axel Russo appeared and actually spoke to him in front of his fiancée! Live interview with our source in 5…4…3…2…'

"Holy…" Axel moaned the minute he saw Ted's face appear on the screen. First he was hit with a wave of fury, then sadness for Renee for having to see this before Axel even knew about it, then sheer curiosity.

"Man, this stuff is intense." Ted said on the screen. "This kid sent Axel a letter written in blood, right? I don't know, it must be some kind of kinky fetish for the guy or something…"

"This asshole has some serious nerve." Axel growled, turning to Perry. "How do you plan to control this?"

"Well, the media's going to be throwing steaming piles of shit left and right, and once the battle is over, you're going to go on TV and deny everything." The brunette walked up to Axel and patted him on the shoulder.

"Good luck, man. You're going to need it."

* * *

**A/N:** Heyyy guys. Sorry this took me so long to get out. D8 I feel terrible, but I've just had all this crazy stuff going on and...yeah. I mean, I'm being forced to read To Kill A Mockingbird (not that I really mind, because, it's an amazing book) but I have to do that, and I haven't talked to my one friend in forever and she might be coming to visit me, and...OH! Let's not forget the shitstorm of state tests! Whoo~ [sarcasm]

Anywhosel, I hope that this'll be finished soon. I have to work on the whole stepdad pseudo shota fic that I promised you guys, recently named to "Behind Closed Doors," I have to work on my plot for NaNoWriMo because right now it sucks more than Roxas after Axel's had a bad day at work (HAHA! Funny xD) aaaaannnnnddd I'm going to co-author a fic with Xanjen (for whom this fic is dedicated, might I add)

By the way! I have a new email. It's yellow lemons gmail . com. If any of you want to chat with me, feel free! Also, for any of you who have a DeviantART account and want to chat, I'm generally on the chat on weekends at 8:00 p.m. EST. (That's 7:00 p.m. Central and 5:00 p.m. Western) and would love to talk to you guys. You can hunt me out in iRPG (I'm usually there) and do the command /whois ghostie-girl. If it says I'm active, go to rpDRAMA. You can do this by typing /join rpdrama in the chat line. By the way, I'm ghostie-girl. ;D

Hope to see some of you sometime! Love ya!

~Sara


	3. Chapter 3

Axel groaned as he opened his eyes, the mid-afternoon sun rudely interrupting his much-deserved sleep. He could only imagine how wicked his hangover would be once he actually decided to get his lazy ass out of bed, considering the amount of scotch that he had consumed the night earlier.

He rolled over in the bed and stretched his arm out, only to find the other side empty and cold. Things had been like this for months; his late nights of drinking alone, waking up alone. Renee had moved back in with her parents because she "couldn't handle the stress of the situation."

Approximately four and a half months had passed since Ted had gone to the press and told them about Axel's nonexistent affair with Roxas DuPont. He still hadn't made his address to the general public, informing them that it was all a lie, hence he was half single and tabloids were having a field day.

In the interim, however, the redhead had been given several opportunities to learn a little about his supposed secret lover. Roxas DuPont, age 17, blonde hair and blue eyes and about 5'4", was a complete nobody. It should appear that his parents do not exist, and if they do that the young DuPont has severed all ties with them. He owns his own apartment, has his own job, quit high school and the ripe young age of fifteen, and has since been doing what normal people do: living.

Axel huffed into his pillow and buried his face a little further in, unwilling to even look up to check the time of his digital clock. Thinking about Roxas (he was now, mentally, on first-name-basis with the kid) and Renee and all of the other shit that was going on in his life was just depressing. It made him want to drink, which he knew he shouldn't do, because that would just give reporters and the like even more to make fun of him for.

_Briiiing!_

Axel groaned and picked up his head slowly, glancing over at the caller ID on the phone. He quickly recognized Perry's number and reached over, feeling as though he was moving through a bowl of molasses.

"Hello?" His voice was thick from sleep and the harsh, sweet taste of his previous night's drinks. He cleared his throat once, eyes have-lidded, and waited for the person on the other end to start speaking.

"Whatever you do, don't turn on the TV or buy any magazines." The younger voice warned. "I think that this whole mess is at its peak, which means that you're probably going to be giving your statements today."

"Statements? Perry, that's plural."

"Congratulations genius. You can officially pass fourth grade English."

"I thought I was only going to be giving one statement, Perry." Axel rubbed his eyes and sat up in bed, glancing around the room. His clothes were strewn about, the white sheets were askew, and the door was ajar.

"You were. But then I decided that you were going to have to give more if we want this to be cleared up quickly. Which I assume is what you want. Right?" Mild irritation sounded in his agent's voice, and Axel sighed.

"Perry, I don't _want_ to give more than one statement."

"Oh Jesus. Don't tell me you're actually starting to like this little creeper."

"Now, did I say that?" Axel shook his head. "No, I'm just as cold toward him for ruining my life as I was when all of this started. I mean, Christ, now I can't even _move_ without someone reporting that it has something to do with an affair. According to these assholes, I've not only been with Roxas, but with five prostitutes, none of whom were women, might I add."

"Yeah, I know, it sucks." Perry said. "Your girlfriend hates your guts, she won't talk to you, your own family doesn't even know what's going on, you have some psychopathic fag chasing after you-"

"Perry, I have a confession to make." Axel interrupted, not really wanting to listen to the rest of the assessment on his current situation.

"Oh? What's that?" Sarcasm dripped from the words, but the redhead continued anyway.

"I've been having these…"

"…these dreams." The blonde murmured. He looked over at Dr. Campbell from his position on the couch and his brow furrowed. "They're really graphic, too."

"Well, why don't you tell me what they're about?" The older man asked, raising his eyebrows. "What happens? Are they graphic sexually, or violently…?"

"Um…sexually." The blonde's brows knitted together, and he stared up at the ceiling. "It's with…_him._"

"Mr. Russo?"

"Yeah, Perry?"

"That's…um…kind of disturbing, to tell you the truth." Perry cleared his throat, and Axel closed his eyes and frowned.

"Yeah, Perry, that's just what I need to hear. And I know it is, but one can't really help what one dreams about, can you? Now, if you don't mind, I'd really like to get this off my chest. I'm sure as hell not going to tell Renee, or anyone else for that matter, but I have to tell _someone_."

Perry sighed. "I know how that feels. Keep talking, I suppose. Your first statement isn't until…about an hour from now."

"Thanks, man. Well, anyway. In these dreams, other than like…" Axel sighed and took a deep breath. "Other than the actual sex, these dreams are like…"

"…really kinky." The blonde grinned and closed his eyes, remembering the things that the redhead had done to him in his dreams the night before. "I mean, they're toys, and bondage and that kind of stuff and…"

"And?" Dr. Campbell asked, eyebrows raised.

"I…think it means something."

"Ladies and gentlemen." Axel began, standing in front of about a dozen microphones attached to a podium. "I'm here today to disprove all of the accusations of my supposed affair with Roxas DuPont.

"These claims are not true. I am still in a relationship with my girlfriend, Renee Benson. She and I are working through this, slowly but surely, and assure you all that if all of this _libel_ would simply stop, the problem would be cleared up immediately."

As soon as he stopped speaking, he was assaulted by a million different questions from all directions. One that he heard distinctly, though, a woman's voice, asked, "Mr. Russo, have you ever had contact with Roxas DuPont?"

"Yes. He approached me when I had my signing at the Angel Breath Café a few months ago. We exchanged a few words, I gave him my autograph, and we shook hands. Other than that, the only communication has been through unanswered fan mail."

More questions. All the redhead was aware of were voices surrounding him, and he had to close his eyes for a brief moment to again try to isolate one of the questions. It wasn't difficult. "Mr. Russo, what are your feelings toward Mr. DuPont?"

"I am going to state this as simply and as clearly as I can." Axel said, opening his eyes and looking at all of the cameras seriously. "I am _not_ in love with this person. My entire devotion goes to Renee and to her family. The accusations of my having an affair _with another man_ are about as cruel to her as they are to me, and neither of us appreciates them. I have no relationship with Roxas DuPont, nor will I ever.

"It is unfortunate that he has feelings for me that I do not return, and I hope that he might find someone, some day, who loves him, whether that person be male or female. I hope that, for Mr. DuPont's sake as well as mine and Renee's, that this all stops. I'm sure he is suffering just as much as we are. Thank you."

More questions shot forward at Axel, but he ignored them and turned around to face Perry. Renee was standing there beside him, her eyes red rimmed and her face long and sad. He walked over to her and smiled, but the smile that she returned said that it was only for the cameras.

Axel rolled out of bed and almost landed square on the floor, had he not stuck his feet out at the last moment and somehow landed on them. A quick glance at the clock told him that it was eleven at night, and that he had been sleeping for the last six hours.

Downstairs, he could hear the sound of the TV turned down to a low volume, and Perry's voice responding to someone he couldn't hear (the guy was addicted to his Blackberry, so it didn't surprise Axel in the least that he was chatting away on it.)

Fully dressed, he trudged out of his bedroom and down the hall, over to the staircase, and somehow managed to get down the three flights of stairs without falling flat on his face and breaking something important.

"Yo, Perry." He called. The brunette glanced up at him and muttered something into his phone that sounded like, 'I'll call you back' and pocketed the device.

"Good evening sleeping beauty. How was your rest? Are you any prettier now?"

Axel sneered. "Very funny. Who was on the phone?"

Perry visibly stiffened. Axel's brow furrowed, and when he didn't receive a response he repeated his question.

"It was…no one. Just a person."

"Perry, what's up?" Axel came the rest of the way down the stairs and stood in front of his agent, only about a foot and a half away from the sole guest that he had had in months.

"Axel…you're not going to like this."

"Tell me anyway. Come on, I'm a big boy. I can take it."

Perry looked up at Axel and sighed, shaking his head. "It's…it's Roxas DuPont. He's dead, Axel. He killed himself."

* * *

**A/N:** Waaaahhhhh! Isn't this terrible? Roxy is dead by his own hand! I mean, who woulda thunk it! :O

I know, I know. You all are like, really sad, right? You're thinking, "OH MY GOD! How could she do this? This is the girl who wrote a story about some guy kidnapping a fourteen-year-old boy, raping him, beating him, and abusing him emotionally, and they still have a happy ending! She totally killed that chance, now!"

Also, I'm sure there are those of you who are thinking, "No, Roxas isn't really dead. He just _tried_ to kill himself, but he failed. He's going to be in the hospital, and when he wakes up Axel is going to be standing there to greet him with a present and a kiss and they're going to live happily ever after." Well, sorry guys. I hate to break it to you, but I think you deserve to know. He's actually dead. :(

But! There is still hope. There will be a happy ending, I swear. You just have to be patient for it. There is only one chapter, and then the epiclogue. I'm sure you guys will love it. ^^

~Sara


	4. Chapter 4

"Thank you so much for coming down, Mr. Russo." This man, Detective Steinberger, was apparently the head of the major case squad or something (Axel had spent the last two days drowning his guilt in Law and Order: Criminal Intent.) "We just need you to take a look at some things…this kid was very…interesting."

Axel nodded numbly and followed the much shorter man into the apartment building. It had been roped off, and there was a large crowd with at least three dozen people gathered around the entrance, not including the hoard of paparazzi.

To say that this building was in the darker section of town would be an understatement. This was the slum of the slums: bums lining the streets, gangs shooting up the 7-Eleven down the street without anyone casting a second glance. Cars with bullet holes in the doors were an occasional sight, and when you bothered to look inside you were either see a drug transaction taking place or some guy getting a bad head job from a blonde hooker that could easily be a man or a woman.

The redhead considered all of this as he stepped inside the small, 700 square foot apartment. It was divided up into a kitchen in one room, a small living room off to the side, and a bed/bathroom just down the four-foot-long hall. It was dark, the only light coming from a flickering light in the center of the room. Something about the place made Axel think of that movie _Pulse_ or whatever, but the thought was far from the front of his mind.

"So, Mr. Russo," The detective began, leading him into the bedroom. "In here, we found all this stuff about you…posters, CDs and the like…and some other stuff…but we'll give that to you later. I guess you can just…walk around or something…"

Once the older man noticed that Axel was paying him no attention, he trailed off and cleared his throat. "Well, I'll just be in the other room if you need me."

Again, a dumb nod served as a response. The star walked over to the bed and sat down on the edge, hands folded between his legs. He just looked around, tried to put himself in Roxas's shoes for the time being. He could barely imagine coming home to this _dump_ every day of his life. The thought sent a cold shiver running up his spine.

There were detectives, medical examiners, and a few crime scene investigators walking in and out of the room, and Axel knew full well that the only reason this particular case was getting so much attention was because of him. Each of them cast Axel strange looks that said, 'What is he doing here?'

"Excuse me," He said to one of the detectives after about ten minutes of just sitting there, alone with his self-punishing thoughts. "Am I allowed to like…touch things?"

She was young and had long brown hair that kind of reminded him of Renee, but the thought was dispelled immediately. "Oh yeah, sure. We've already documented and brushed everything in here so…go for it."

He nodded and stood up, walked over to the dark end table next to the bed. He picked up a black iPod that had probably, at some point, been stolen from a more fortunate person than the little blonde. Clicking the 'menu' button, he wasn't at all surprised to see that the last song that Roxas had listened to had been one of his.

He plugged the earphones into his ears and pressed 'play,' and immediately his lyrics for _Bleeding Roses _began blaring. He smiled softly and glanced up, looking around the room.

The theme was pretty similar for everything: black and white, with splashes of red here and there. In another life, this would've been Axel's dream apartment. Small and meek and really, really shitty…but home.

He strolled around, listening to himself sing, looking through the sparsely filled closet and empty drawers. There were posters of Axel all over the wall, and every single CD that Axel had ever made was stacked up in one of the corners. It was romantic, in a terribly morbid way. And the entire time, it was almost impossible for Axel to consider that this kid was dead _because of him_.

"Um, excuse me, Mr. Russo?" Detective Steinberger walked up to him. "Before you leave, could you come in and get a few more things? Just…some stuff that he wanted you to have. There was an envelope…"

"Oh, yeah, of course." Axel smiled politely and walked back in the apartment, really having gone out into the hallway with no intention of leaving. He had just needed some air.

The two walked back into the small little room, and it was only then that Axel realized that after about an hour and a half of scoping out Roxas's bedroom, he still had the iPod plugged into his ears. He took the earphones out, which had long since ceased playing music, and pulled the iPod out of his pocket.

"Hey, detective." He said as he walked towards the bedroom, glancing back over his shoulder. "I'm just going to put this back in here real quick, okay?"

Detective Steinberger turned around, and immediately he began shaking his head at Axel. "Uh, no, Mister Russo you can keep it just come back-"

The redhead furrowed his brows and turned around, shaking his head at the other man. However, he immediately wished that he had listened; the first thing he saw was two county employees, wheeling something out of the apartment that had a white sheet over it and vaguely looked like a body.

His stomach turned, and when a small, pale arm fell off of the table or cart or whatever it was and Axel saw the long, red gash that ran from the wrist to the elbow, he really thought he was going to be sick. He dashed into the bathroom and bent over the toilet, sat there without anything happening, and stood up with a deep breath.

The first thing that he confronted was the bathtub. It hadn't been drained, because it was still full of water. However, it didn't look like water should; it was a deep red, and Axel hesitated to say _blood_ red, because that's what he knew it was. It looked like, from a distance, it had the consistency of pudding, and around the edges it was starting to crust deep red.

Axel took a deep breath, and realized that his ears were ringing. His body was hot, and he knew that it wasn't the temperature in the apartment (and was pretty sure it wasn't arousal, because he wasn't one of those freaks who got off on death.) He turned his head and quickly walked out of the room, grabbed the manila folder from Detective Steinberger's hand, and walked right out of the apartment without looking back.

"Axel!" Renee called, shutting the front door and setting down her purse on the counter like she had every day up until about half a year ago. "Axel, I'm here! I want to talk to you!"

Upon receiving no response, she frowned and started up the stairs, shedding her jacket. "Well, anyway. I decided that staying at my parents' house, I wouldn't get any of these problems that I have with our current situation worked out with you. So I thought maybe…I could move back in. And we could talk about it. I know that none of the stuff they said you did with that boy is true, I was just a little overwhelmed…"

She walked into the bedroom, where she assumed her boyfriend would have been, only to find the bed empty. Her frown deepened and she dropped her jacket on the bed, walked into the bathroom.

She gasped when she saw Axel sitting in the bathtub in a full bath with a .45 in his hand, an unfamiliar iPod plugged into his ears, and what looked to be about 150 to 200 letters next to him.

"Axel? What the hell are you doing?"

He looked up at her, and she noticed that her eyes were red rimmed and his cheeks were streaked with tears. He smiled weakly and reached up, pulling one of the earphones out. "Why hello, there."

"What are you doing?" She asked again, fear and irritation mounting.

"You know, I've discovered something very interesting." He began, ignoring her question. He sat up (he had slumped down the back of the tub slightly) and clicked the iPod on 'pause,' picked up a few letters. "You see, there's a number on each of these songs where the album name should be. I like, just noticed this, right? Well, funny thing…each of those numbers corresponds with a letter," He picked up the letter that was sitting on top and waved it slightly. "That describes how he was feeling at the time."

"He? Axel, what the hell are you talking about? And will you _please_ put that gun away? God, if I had known you were this upset…"

He snorted. "Renee, I love you, but don't flatter yourself. I made it six months without you; if I was going to kill myself because you left me, it would've been quite a while ago."

She frowned and felt a lump form in her throat, and she struggled to choke back tears. "Axel, get rid of that gun. I want to talk to you."

Again, he ignored her, and began talking as though he was talking to himself. "I know, I don't think I've ever loved anything as much as he loved me. He was so upset when I made that address to the press…" He sighed and shook his head. "Its all my fault. He's dead, and its my fault."

What the redhead was talking about just clicked with Renee, and her mouth dropped open. "Oh my God Axel…that kid…he…?"

"His name was Roxas, and yes, he did." Axel narrowed his eyes at her and frowned. "You know, its very interesting that you should decide to come back right after he died. Very interesting…"

He sighed and picked up the gun, his middle finger on the trigger. He held it like a diva might hold a cigarette, and she took a step forward toward him. "Axel, please don't-"

She was cut off when he put the gun against his temple and closed his eyes. The last thing he was fully aware of was Renee lunging toward him with fear and regret in her eyes, the soft music of _Everybody Hurts_ in his left ear, and the deafening bang of the gun in his right.

* * *

**A/N:** Oh yeah, baby! Suck on THAT! 8D

Man, I am so proud of this chapter. I'm like...I mean, this turned out perfectly. I don't think I could have written it better to go with what I had in my imagination. And, happy happy joy joy feelings right now, this is the last chapter! Then...THE EPICLOGUE! And yes, then I'll start writing that fic that I promised you guise like, forever ago. You know, the one about Axel being Roxy's stepdad? Yeah, it's going to be called "Behind Closed Doors," so look for it. I think it'll be very nice. ;D And it's going to be a little longer and there will be more lemon.

What makes me sad is the very few number of people that reviewed on this. D8 I mean, like, two people reviewed every chapter. That's just SAD. DDDD8 I was really looking forward to you guise enjoying this story and now it's just like...meh. :(

Well, whatever. See ya in the epiclogue!

~Sara


	5. Epilogue

"Miss, please. There's something that you have to understand that I feel it's my duty to tell you. The young Mr. DuPont…Roxas, that is…he was a very troubled young boy. I was only his doctor for about six or seven years, but-"

"Only?"

"Yes…but you must understand, with someone like Roxas, it takes years of intensive therapy to cure the problem that he had. It truly was a case of nature versus nurture. Had he had a normal family life, chances are that he would have gone on to live a completely healthy life."

"What…what kind of problem did he have?"

The doctor chuckled and removed his glasses, crossed his legs, and examined the young woman who currently sat on his couch. Her eyes were red rimmed, and looked like they had been that way for quiet some time. "I think you mean problem_s_, Miss."

"Well, whatever." She waved this away and shook her head, sniffed. "I want to know everything about him."

"Well, in order to do that we would probably be here for quite a while. But I can tell you that he was…well, he was a nice kid. His parents were the ones who had problems."

"Are you going to tell me about them?"

"Well…" The doctor hesitated. "I suppose that the patient-doctor privilege is void…" He sighed and continued speaking.

"His parents were divorced when he was about eight, and the fight over custody never ended. They could never work out a schedule, they could never agree on who would have primary custody…His father, in my opinion, was the responsible one. He was the one who sent Roxas to me, paid for his school, everything. His mother, however…she was…she was a piece of work."

"How so?"

"Well, for starters, schizophrenia runs in their family, on her side. Her mother had it, and I'm sure that had to account for a touch of why she was so off-kilter. Now, that's not to say that she was schizophrenic. I don't think she was. But Roxas's grandmother had some very strange habits and refused to take medication, from what I know, so Mrs. DuPont's childhood wasn't exactly ideal.

"But back to my point. She was constantly filling Roxas's head full of insane ideas, things like, 'You always get the one you love if you love them enough,' and 'Prosperity will come to you eventually, you just have to wait for it.' But that's only the tip of the iceberg…She put him down several times a day, excusing it with, 'He needs to learn how to take it so that he can be a strong adult.' It just baffles me that the judge in charge of that case thought that she was a capable parent."

The woman sniffed and her brow furrowed, a frown creasing her face. "So…wait. Was he…schizophrenic, too?"

"Yes, I believe he was. He would come in telling me about friends of his that I'm not quite sure existed outside of his mind, tell me about things that didn't actually happen. He told me three times that his father died, and that he was going to the funeral. Just for the record, his father is alive today." The doctor frowned and shook his head. "A very sad story, Roxas DuPont. His mother told him that he should never take medication for anything because there was 'absolutely nothing wrong with him,' so of course when I suggested a treatment he denied it immediately."

"God I have so many questions…I mean, what the hell did this all have to do with my boyfriend? And how old was he? I just-" She broke off and sniffed again and looked like she was trying to suppress tears. "I don't know."

"Well, to answer your first question, I'm going to say that what most likely happened is Roxas noticed your boyfriend somewhere, on TV or in an interview or magazine, and latched onto him. Your boyfriend was a strong person? Reliable?"

"Yes. Very."

"Well, Roxas probably saw this in him and latched onto it. Reliability and safety were two things that this poor boy never had, and when he saw them in this person he idolized it. He…fell in love, I suppose." He chuckled. "Very interesting. Anyway, to answer your second question, he would be eighteen years old in about a month."

The woman did a double take. "He was seventeen years old?"

"Yes ma'am. But he was very bright for his age…very independent."

"Wait…if he was seventeen, how did he have his own apartment? I thought you had to be eighteen to sign into that…" She looked confused, and the doctor sighed. He hated having to tell this story over to someone else…it was almost worse than having to listen to it.

"He was emancipated from both of his parents at fifteen. His father signed for the apartment…I truly believe that he cared for that boy, regardless of what Roxas thought. But his father paid for the apartment and sent Roxas a check monthly to cover his living expenses. I think when he moved out was when his life really fell apart." He shook his head. "A very sad, sad story, that boy."

"…Doctor?" She looked up and he saw that her eyes were filled with tears. "Do you think he's in a good place?"

He sighed again and smiled at her, having had to deal with this kind of sadness in so many patients before. "Yes, I do. I think he's in a very good place. But wherever he is, I'm sure he's thinking of you."

_Axel blinked his eyes open only to find himself standing. Weird…he had never fallen asleep standing before. Well, anyway. The darkness that beat against his eyes was starting to give him a headache, and he waited for his eyes to adjust to the black; a blessing that didn't come. _

_ He stumbled blindly around for a few moments, waiting to run into furniture or a wall or _something_, but instead he was just met with a light that literally looked like it was at the end of a tunnel. He walked toward it, not really sure of where he was or where he was going but knowing that he just needed a reprieve. _

_ It seemed like two seconds and twenty years before he finally got there, but he got there. The light was normal, not too bright. And all he could see was a bed, and sitting on it…was that…? _

_ "Axel." The blonde said, standing up and folding his hands behind his back. He was wearing a casual suit-like thing; jeans, a nice dress shirt, and an open blazer. "You made it." _

_ "I…made it?" He asked, raising his eyebrows. "I'm kinda confused. Is this like, a dream? The product of the guilt that's been eating away at me?" _

_ Roxas smiled and shook his head. "No, I don't think so. I mean, that's what I thought at first, too. But then I laid down in this bed, really comfortable by the way, and I feel asleep and stuff…and when I woke up I was still here. So I don't think this is a dream." _

_ Axel nodded and looked around, and he found himself walking forward. Roxas watched him, not really sizing him up and not really giving him a once-over, just…looking at him. _

_ The redhead came to a stop in front of his biggest fan (the only one that he knew of that was willing to die for him) and looked down at the other's small frame. He was probably a good five or six inches shorter than Axel, and his deep blue eyes captured Axel's green pair a little unexpectedly. _

_"So…where is 'here,' exactly?" His eyebrows came together in confusion, and he looked around. Upon further examination, he noticed that not only was there a bed, but there were two end tables on either side, each with a lamp and one with a clock, and the two of them were standing on a wood floor. _

_ Roxas sighed. "I don't know. It's like…well, purgatory I guess, if you believe in that sort of thing. I mean, its not like Heaven could ever be like this, and I expected Hell to be a little more…you know…" _

_ He made some gesture with his hands where they came up in front of him and his fingers did a dance-like move, shortly followed by said hands moving in a circle shape and Roxas making a seriously fail explosion sound. "You know. Like that." _

_ "Um…not really. But whatever." Axel shook his head and closed his eyes. "God, I am like, so confused. I mean, I thought you-" _

_ "Oh, yeah, that. I was going to get to that." Roxas cut him off and stepped back about a foot, taking off his jacket and rolling his sleeves up. Axel glanced down and immediately drew in a sharp breath, his mind having difficulty coming to terms with what he was seeing. _

_ Beginning at Roxas's wrists and running all the way up to the crook of his elbows, on both arms, were two deep, long white scars. The wounds looked like they had been inflicted years ago and had long since healed, and Roxas looked up at Axel half with fear and half with confusion. _

_ "See? So I _did_-" _

_ "Yeah, you did." Axel blew out the breath that he wasn't even aware that he had been holding in and shook his head. "Man, this is so freaky. I mean like, what the hell am I doing here if this isn't even a dream? Is this like, that soul travel thing or whatever?" He stopped and crossed his arms, chuckling. "Did Renee put something in my evening glass of wine again?" _

_ "Oh…" Roxas brought his hand up to his mouth and his fingers gently touched his lips, and Axel almost choked on the unexpected arousal that stemmed from this action. "Oh…you…haven't…you haven't figured it out yet, have you?" _

_ "Figured what out yet?" Axel asked. _

_ Roxas stood there for a moment, just watching the redhead, before he sighed and picked up a hand mirror that had appeared out of nowhere. Axel looked in it, and for a moment didn't notice anything out of the ordinary. Sure, he looked a little tired…but…what was that mark…?_

_ "Love…you killed yourself, too." Roxas said, bringing the mirror down. He reached up and touched Axel's temple, gently tracing the round scar that resided there. "You're dead." _

_ Axel wasn't sure how long he had been sitting on the bed staring into nothingness, and he wasn't sure how long Roxas's arms had been around his neck. Time in this place, wherever the hell he was, was all screwed up. Two seconds felt like two centuries, and he wasn't sure but he would bet that two centuries felt like two seconds. _

_ "What are you thinking about?" Roxas murmured. His chin was resting on Axel's shoulder, his lips right next to Axel's ear, his hands moving slowly up and down the length of Axel's arms and his chest. _

_ "I'm not dead." Axel breathed. "This is just some sick, twisted dream, and I'm not dead. I'm going to wake up, and I'm going to give a concert and this all will turn out to be just a really bad dream and…"_

_ Roxas raised an eyebrow. "And…?" _

_ "And I'm going to wake up next to Renee and give her a kiss and everything will turn out to be okay. Okay?" Axel desperately turned toward Roxas, whose face was unexpectedly close, searching his eyes for some sort of confirmation. Instead, all he found was a mixture of sadness and pity. _

_ "Roxas?" _

_ It was then that he realized he had never called the boy by his name to his face. He had always referred to him as 'Roxas' in conversation (at least after the blonde had killed himself) but to his face always said 'you.' Of course, Roxas had called him by his first name plenty of times. But Axel had never returned the favor. _

_ "Axel, listen to me." Roxas got up on his knees and slid his arms all the way down Axel's chest, purring. "I have waited…_so long_…for this moment. I mean, God, the last few years of my life were lived for you. And when you…when you went on TV and said those things, I was just crushed." _

_ "I know, and I didn't mean to-" _

_ "I know you didn't." Roxas said. He brought his hands up and rubbed Axel's shoulders and neck, shrugged. "I guess what I'm trying to say is, I finally have everything that I want. And I want you to understand that if I show a certain…reluctance, to your ideas of everything going back to the way they were with you and your girlfriend or anything, its not because I don't want you to be happy. Its just that…the way things were, I wasn't happy. The way things _are_ is perfect for me." _

_ Axel sighed and let this sink in, and before he knew it he was leaning against Roxas's body with Roxas soothingly caressing his chest. "I know its hard to understand right now; I couldn't wrap my mind around it either. The last thing I remember is 'falling asleep' in the bath and waking up here. Obviously, now, I know what happened, but…" _

_ "But how did you find out?" Axel looked up and felt Roxas's crisp shirt crinkle beneath him, and he had to resist the urge to close his eyes and breath in the smell of the blonde boy and clean linen. _

_ Roxas chuckled. "Well, its not every day that you wake up wearing clothes that you've never purchased with two scars longer than an episode of House on your arms." _

_ "Longer than an episode of House?" Axel asked. He raised his eyebrows and actually smiled. _

_ "Um…yeah. It was a joke. You know how everyone always says that House episodes are like, the longest episodes ever because half the time you can't understand their medical-lingo?" Roxas raised his eyebrows back at Axel and waited for a response. _

_ "No." _

_ "Oh. Well, in that case, its not like you wake up every morning with two scars that are nine inches long each on either arm with no idea how you got them." He smiled and shrugged as best he could with Axel in his arms. "I knew right off the bat what had happened. And I remembered you giving your speech and…well, I can put two and two together." _

_ "Man, that sucks." Axel breathed. He turned around and sat up, looking at Roxas in the eyes. "You know that I didn't mean to hurt you. Not that I really cared at the moment…" He closed his eyes and shook his head in frustration. "I don't know. I don't even know why I care about you so much all of a sudden. I mean, before you were just like, some weirdo psycho fan who wrote letters to me in blood…" _

_ Roxas laughed. "Oh yeah. I thought you would understand how serious I was about you when you got that." _

_ "Yeah, well, you did a pretty good job about making your point. But anyway." _

_ "Yes." _

_ They looked at each other in silence for a moment, and without even thinking Axel leaned forward and pressed his lips against Roxas's. The blonde tasted sweet, like one of those huge lollipops that you buy at the circus. _

_ Roxas returned the kiss with enthusiasm, moving forward and pressing his body against the redhead's. The warmth was much appreciated…especially considering the cold that neither of the two boys had been able to shake since they arrived. _

_ "Axel." He gasped, parting his lips and letting Axel's tongue snake inside his mouth. The blonde almost choked half in surprise and half because Axel immediately dove for the back of Roxas's throat. _

_ Axel pushed Roxas back on the mystery bed and mounted his hips, part of him trying to figure out why the hell all of a sudden he had the impulse to engage in sexual congress with a man (boy, whatever). However, that part was much smaller than the part of him that really, really wanted Roxas. Wanted him more badly than he had ever wanted Renee…or anyone for that matter. _

_ He leaned down and latched his lips onto Roxas's collar bone, half kissing him and half sucking on him. "Mm…Axel, that feels good." _

_ The redhead smiled and glanced up at Roxas, eyebrows raised, but this time in amusement rather than confusion. "Oh really?" _

_ "Yeah really." Roxas answered, smiling back at him. He wrapped his arms around Axel's neck and combed his hair gently. _

_ "Does…this feel good?" He reached down and unbuttoned Roxas's jeans, pushed them down to the blonde's waist. He then proceeded to stroke the smooth, milky skin of Roxas's inside thigh. _

_ "It tickles." Roxas answered, giggling. "I never knew you were such a tease." _

_ "I'm generally not." Axel lowered himself down and ran his tongue from Roxas's knee up to his hip and back down again, then kissed his way back up. "But its something about you…" _

_ "Mm…something about me?" Roxas smiled and closed his eyes, leaned back on the bed. Axel's lips felt amazing on his untouched skin, like a feather. A wet feather, that is. _

_ "Yeah, something about you. I don't know; I've never done it with a guy before, so maybe that's it." Axel shrugged and pressed his lips hard against Roxas's hip and inched over so that his mouth was just below the naval, tongue flicking out every so often, eliciting the softest whimpers from his new lover. _

_ "Axel, these teasing is kinda getting to me." _

_ "Then why don't you tell me what you want me to do?" _

_ Roxas frowned down at Axel and narrowed his eyes. "You know what I want you to do." _

_ "Oh? Let's see, let me guess…" Axel brought his hand up and slowly dragged it across Roxas's stomach, pretending to think. "Could it be that you want me right…here?" _

_His hand moved down and, Roxas was almost dismayed to find out, over his boxers and over the erection that had formed about five minutes into their initial conversation. Axel smirked and ground the heel of his hand against it, and Roxas gasped, letting out a choked moan. _

_ "I'll take that as a yes." He continued, and after a few moments Roxas closed his legs and turned on his side, moaning. Of course, this did nothing to help his situation, considering that while he might be limited access to his cock Axel had a great reach of his balls. Lovely. _

_ "Axel," Roxas gasped, shaking with pleasure. "Really. I _need_ you. Like, right now." _

_ "Nah, I think I want to play a little more." Axel chuckled and smiled innocently up at Roxas, who was trying to give him a death glare but kept getting interrupted by his own moans. "However, I will give you this." _

_ He reached up and hooked his index fingers on the elastic of Roxas's boxers and pulled them down, exposing his erection to the air (which by now had grown quite warm) as well as his very nicely shaped ass. "On your stomach, please." _

_ Roxas obeyed, turning over so that the front of his body was pressed against the sheets that felt like satin. He could feel Axel's hands on his hips, and a nervous knot began to form in his gut for fear of what the redhead would do. _

_ Axel grinned and pulled Roxas up, forcing him onto his knees. Then, with slight hesitation (because really, he had never done anything like this even in his worst nightmares) he leaned down and pressed his tongue against the red (and wet) entrance to the boy. _

_ Roxas gasped, taking in a sharp breath, and let out a long and deep moan. If what Axel had been doing to Roxas's thigh felt good, this felt beyond amazing. Axel was making some motion with his tongue that felt like he was moving it in circles, at the same time feeling like he was trying to lick deeper and deeper and _deeper_…_

_ Without warning he pulled out, and Roxas whimpered at the loss of stimulus. "Is it good, Roxy?" _

_ "God yes." The blonde breathed. "It's amazing. Don't stop." _

_ Axel laughed. "Or what? You'll moan until my ears bleed?" When he received no response he sighed and released Roxas's hips, sat up, and started on the button and zipper of his own pants (which he now realized was a pair of very sexy Levi's.) _

_ Roxas turned around and made a soft sound of curiosity in the back of his throat, his brows knitting together in brief confusion. "What are you doing?" _

_ "What you want me to do." Somehow he had grown completely serious, and he looked at Roxas with a straight face and determined eyes. "You do want me to this, right?" _

_ "Yeah, but-" _

_ "Okay then." Axel pushed his pants and boxers down, exposing the erection that he had been containing. _

_ Roxas's face made him want to laugh. His expression turned from one of confusion to half horror and half disbelief. He scrambled back against the headboard and clutched a pillow against him, glancing nervously up at Axel. _

_ "Axel…it's…" _

_ "It's…?" _

_ Roxas swallowed and took a deep breath, shrugged. "Huge. Like, oh my God. It's huge. I don't think I've ever…I mean…wow." _

_ Axel laughed. "Yeah, I guess. That…is a good thing, right?" _

_ "Axel, I'll be blunt. I don't think it'll fit." _

_ The redhead paused. "…What? Of course it'll fit." _

_ Roxas shook his head. "No it won't. It's too big. It won't fit." _

_ "I'll make it fit." _

_ "Will not." _

_ "Will to." _

_ "Will not." _

_ "See?" Axel gasped. He thrust hard into Roxas again and again, keeping up his pace, listening to the sounds of Roxas's ragged breathing and loud cries. "I told you…it would…fit…" _

_ "Oh God, Axel, yes!" He cried out, eyes tearing up from pleasure, lurching forward every time Axel pushed himself back in. "Yes…hah…its so good…" _

_ "I know." Axel grinned and pulled his hips up as well as pushed them in, and Roxas cried out louder. Just listening to him was arousing, but watching him was completely different. _

_ His body was coated in a layer of sweat, and his skin was red, his cock standing at full attention, begging for release. His body jerked when Axel touched him somewhere that felt especially nice (which, considering how much pleasure he knew Roxas was feeling, was pretty much everywhere) and he would occasionally grip the sheets and try (and fail) to smother his moans in a pillow. _

_ "You're close." Axel breathed, and Roxas whimpered. _

_ "Yes…" _

_ The redhead let out a breathy laugh and smiled. "Me too." _

_ Axel reached around and grabbed Roxas's "organ," pumping him furiously, trying to force his release before he came himself. Roxas, in return, rewarded him with a loud moan and a jerk of his whole body. _

_"Did you-?" _

_ "Hnn…Axel…harder…" Roxas curled in on himself as much as he could, a tight knot forming in his stomach, begging for release. "Please…" _

_ Axel, who was completely aroused by Roxas's begging (because really, who wouldn't be?) ground their hips together, digging into him, trying to be gentle yet rough at the same time. It was just so _hard_ not to fuck him mercilessly into the mattress. _

_ "Hah…Axel…!" Roxas arched his back and cried out into the pillow, came hard in Axel's waiting hand. Axel, who wasn't very far behind, groaned and thought he probably said Roxas's name at some point as raw pleasure raced through his veins, spilling his seed inside the other. _

_ "I wonder what your girlfriend would think of this." Roxas breathed. He cuddled up against Axel's side, his right hand on Axel's opposite shoulder, eyes closed, fighting off sleep. "I bet she wouldn't approve." _

_ "Its not like she's going to find out." Axel replied. He had been stroking Roxas's spine for what felt like hours, kissing his forehead every now and then, intertwining their fingers. "Unless she decides to kill herself too. But I doubt they'll send her to the same place they sent us." _

_ "Who's 'they'?" Roxas furrowed his eyebrows and glanced up at Axel, who shrugged. _

_ "The entities in charge, I guess. I don't know. You ask me these questions as though I know the answers." He chuckled and kissed the top of Roxas's head, sighed. "But either way, its not like it really matters." _

_ "Why is that?" _

_ "Because we're going to be together forever, however long that is." Axel glanced over at his bedside table, and, not that he was surprised, a digital clock had appeared there at some time. He had to squint to see the numbers, but when he finally saw them he noticed it read 00:00, with both the a.m. and the p.m. settings highlighted. _

_ Roxas giggled and nuzzled Axel's shoulder, kissed the crook of his neck. "This is true." _

_ They laid in silence for a while, Axel stroking Roxas's spine and each one listening to the sound of the other's breathing. All around them was darkness, but it wasn't an oppressing darkness. It was peaceful; just the two of them, and no one else to come along and ruin it. _

_ "Man…" Axel finally whispered, shaking his head. "I can't believe I used to be straight." _

_

* * *

_

**A/N:** Whoo~!

Alrighty! So! This is really exciting! 8D I finally finished this, and I know that all of you people who were waiting for this are probably like, "OH MY GOD FINALLY!" because you get to read it but at the same time you're probably like "OH MY GOD NO!" because its over. WELL! I'm sorry. But anyway. For those of you who didn't read it because you thought it would be too morbid or miserable or whatever, you're probably like "FINALLY!" because you all get to read that fic that I promised you like, a few months ago! 8D

You guys need to look out for "Behind Closed Doors" now, because that's the one that was voted on at the end of Amber and How About Them Saints? so...yeah. That's the one that's going to be next. It used to be "Who's Your Daddy?" but Xanjen and I came up with a better title that's better so...yeah.

Aaaaannnndddd lastly, don't be surprised if I randomly upload some Criminal Minds and/or Glee fanfiction. I just finished Glee (watched it all online with my mother, thank you very much) and there will probably be plenty of FinnxKurt fanfiction, and Criminal Minds is just an amazing show and I TOTALLY ship HotchxReid. (If anyone has a problem with that, die in a hole. ._. no, hahahahaha jk jk jk xP)

Oh, one more thing. I have a Twitter now, so if you want to Tweet me its BeeCityz. 'Cuz I love bees (not really) and I _am_ Sara Bee...so...yeah... xD

~Sara


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